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albadgerI dreamed I had been asked to audition for a part. I don't know if this was for a play or a movie, because that information was conveyed to me before I fell asleep and was thus not in the dream.
The audition was being held at a community college. A light rain was falling as I walked the mile and a half from the nearest parking space to the Audio-Visual Building. Audition space was in a huge, open space, lined with cubbyholes and filled with elementary-school-sized desk/chairs. The director and the leading lady were wedged uncomfortably into chairs, their names carved into the desktops. They offered me a seat. I chose to stand.
The audition itself was brief, no monolog, no cold read. All the director wanted me to do was improv of introducing myself to the lead character in the piece. The director would fill in for the lead. He got out of his desk-chair, dropped to his knees, and hobbled towards me, doing an embarrassing impression of a "little person." Oh Great, I thought. We tried the introduction several ways, with me stooping over, dropping to one knee, and going down on both knees in my own embarrassing little person impression. The leading lady watched silently.
That was it; I said thanks and walked back to where I'd left my backpack. I had to excuse my way through a crowd of fluttery college girls to get my stuff. The girls were atwitter about some matinee idol I'd never heard of. A feisty female security guard wondered if I needed a ride back to my car.
Director came running up to me. "Don't go yet!" he cried. "We have some more stuff we want you to do!" So, yeah, okay. I walked back to the audition space. This time the leading lady wanted the introductions, and asked me to do a variety of accents. "Thanks," she said after the last one, and turned to the director immediately. "I think the first and the second guys we saw would both be fine," she told him. "Either's good for me, you make the choice."
How freakin' RUDE to say this while I'm still standing there! I coldly turned away from her, shook the director's hand robotically, droned "Thankyouforthexperiencegoodluckwithyourproduction" and stormed off. The security guard still thought I needed a ride.
Update: I woke up, fed the cat, went back to sleep, and got an email in my next dream that I'd gotten the part. I was still kind of offended. I hadn't decided if I'd take it before I woke up again.
The audition was being held at a community college. A light rain was falling as I walked the mile and a half from the nearest parking space to the Audio-Visual Building. Audition space was in a huge, open space, lined with cubbyholes and filled with elementary-school-sized desk/chairs. The director and the leading lady were wedged uncomfortably into chairs, their names carved into the desktops. They offered me a seat. I chose to stand.
The audition itself was brief, no monolog, no cold read. All the director wanted me to do was improv of introducing myself to the lead character in the piece. The director would fill in for the lead. He got out of his desk-chair, dropped to his knees, and hobbled towards me, doing an embarrassing impression of a "little person." Oh Great, I thought. We tried the introduction several ways, with me stooping over, dropping to one knee, and going down on both knees in my own embarrassing little person impression. The leading lady watched silently.
That was it; I said thanks and walked back to where I'd left my backpack. I had to excuse my way through a crowd of fluttery college girls to get my stuff. The girls were atwitter about some matinee idol I'd never heard of. A feisty female security guard wondered if I needed a ride back to my car.
Director came running up to me. "Don't go yet!" he cried. "We have some more stuff we want you to do!" So, yeah, okay. I walked back to the audition space. This time the leading lady wanted the introductions, and asked me to do a variety of accents. "Thanks," she said after the last one, and turned to the director immediately. "I think the first and the second guys we saw would both be fine," she told him. "Either's good for me, you make the choice."
How freakin' RUDE to say this while I'm still standing there! I coldly turned away from her, shook the director's hand robotically, droned "Thankyouforthexperiencegoodluckwithyourproduction" and stormed off. The security guard still thought I needed a ride.
Update: I woke up, fed the cat, went back to sleep, and got an email in my next dream that I'd gotten the part. I was still kind of offended. I hadn't decided if I'd take it before I woke up again.
